


baby leave the light on for me

by samandbucky



Series: Buddie Drabbles & Oneshots [4]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, fear of the dark, fears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-17 04:03:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28842831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samandbucky/pseuds/samandbucky
Summary: Buck and Eddie are dating. They're relationship is new, and they're both content with taking things slow. But, when Eddie suggests that Buck sleeps over at his place for the first time without Christopher, Buck panics, because he has a fear that Eddie doesn't know about, and he's terrified that Eddie will make fun of him for it.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Series: Buddie Drabbles & Oneshots [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2107242
Comments: 4
Kudos: 302
Collections: 9-1-1 ▶ Edmundo "Eddie" Diaz / Evan "Buck" Buckley





	baby leave the light on for me

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the anon who sent this prompt to me on tumblr:  
>  _Buck had a bad childhood and is now afraid to sleep in the dark. When he stays with Eddie he is worried that Eddie will laugh at him._
> 
> Title from 'Leave A Light On' by The Saturdays
> 
> also happy 9-1-1 season 4 premiere day!!! i'm so pumped!!!

“So, I was thinking…”

“That’s never a good sign,” Buck replies, laughing when Eddie shoves him playfully. “Alright. Alright. What were you thinking?” He looks over at Eddie. They’re shift is about to end. They’ve got two hours left now. Buck can’t wait to go home after an exhausting and long day at the firehouse.

“What if you came over to mine tonight?” Eddie asks.

“I thought that’s what we were doing anyways?” Buck asks, raising his eyebrows at Eddie.

“No, I mean- well, yes. I just meant… what if you stayed the night?” Eddie asks.

“Oh,” Buck says, trying to ignore all the dark thoughts swirling around in his brain right now. “Um, okay… wh- what about Christopher? We agreed we weren’t going to tell him about our relationship yet.”

“I’m already one step ahead. It’s Saturday, so Carla agreed to watch him for tonight,” Eddie says.

“So, it would just be you and me?” Buck asks, trying not to show his panic. Buck and Eddie have been dating for just about two months. Their relationship is still new. They’ve been taking it slow. They’ve only told people their closest to, such as family members and of course the 118 crew. It was kind of impossible not to tell them when Buck and Eddie both freak out when the other is in danger on calls.

“Just you and me,” Eddie confirms, reaching over to grab Buck’s hand. “Would you be okay with that?”

“I mean, yes- _of course_. I would love nothing more than to spend some quality time with you-”

“Save the dirty talk for the bedroom!” Chimney shouts from the kitchen.

Buck rolls his eyes, though he’s used to the others teasing him and Eddie about their relationship. “So, you want me to spend the night with you at your place? Tonight?”

“Yes,” Eddie replies, nodding. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just thought… it might be good to start somewhere? I mean, we- we don’t have to do anything if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“No,” Buck chuckles. “I know you would never pressure me to do anything I wasn’t comfortable with.”

“You can even sleep on the couch if you want to,” Eddie adds.

“Eddie,”

“I just thought it would be nice to have you there,” Eddie finishes.

“Eddie,” Buck says again, squeezing Eddie’s hand. “I would love to spend the night.”

Eddie sighs in relief. “Oh, thank God,”

Buck smiles reassuringly at Eddie, though deep down he’s panicking. Because of his rough childhood, Buck has developed a fear of the dark. It’s not something he’s proud of, because he’s an adult, and he’s a firefighter for God’s sake, but he’s _afraid of the dark_? What will happen if Eddie finds out about his fear? Buck doesn’t want Eddie to think he’s weak, or make fun of him for it.

Buck dreads when he’s shift finally ends, because this means he’s going to Eddie’s for the night, and there’s a very high chance that Eddie will finally find out about his fear of the dark, that he’s done everything he can to keep a secret from. His sister is the only one who knows about this fear of his.

“Ready to go?” Eddie asks from the doorway of the locker room, where Buck has finished changing back into his normal clothes. “Carla said Christopher’s settling in. He should be asleep soon.”

“Of course he is. That woman is magic,” Buck says, reaching down to grab his phone. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

Eddie grins as he stares at Buck, and nods towards the exit. “The car’s already started,”

Buck smile’s softly, before walking over and grabbing Eddie’s hand.

“Use protection!” Chimney shouts as he walks by Buck and Eddie.

“Eddie, I’m going to kill him,” Buck groans.

“You’re one to talk, Chimney!” Eddie shouts back.

Buck cringes, knowing Chimney is most likely going to Maddie’s. “That does not help, Eds,”

Eddie looks over at Buck, and chuckles when he sees the look on Buck’s face. “Come on,” he says, pulling Buck out of the locker room and leading the way towards his car.

Buck is silent for most of the ride to Eddie’s place.

“You hungry? We can order pizza or something,” Eddie says once they’re inside.

“You’re just making up an excuse so you don’t have to cook,” Buck says.

“As if you’re complaining about me not cooking,” Eddie retorts, raising his eyebrows. “Are you cooking?”

“Hell no, man. I’m exhausted. Pizza it is,” Buck says, whipping out his phone to order the pizza.

Buck and Eddie get settled on Eddie’s couch as they wait for their pizza to arrive. And for a moment, Buck is totally able to completely forget about his fear. He’s able to just relax, and enjoy his time with Eddie.

Buck and Eddie are in the middle of a soft makeout session when the doorbell rings.

“No,” Buck whines when Eddie pulls away, gripping onto Eddie’s shirt.

Eddie chuckles softly, leaning forward and kissing Buck once more, before standing up. “We can’t leave the pizza guy out in the rain. That would be cruel,” he says. “I’ll be right back.”

Buck sighs. “Yeah. Yeah. I’ll go get the plates,” he says, standing up and heading towards the kitchen as Eddie goes to fetch the pizza. Buck grabs the plates and napkins, as well as cups for the drinks.

“This is nice,” Eddie says once they meet up again in the living room. “Just the two of us.”

“It is nice,” Buck agrees, smiling as he looks over at Eddie. “I mean, don’t get me wrong. I love our time with Christopher. Never a dull moment with that kid. But, it’s nice to just be able to relax for a night.”

“Hopefully this won’t be the last time we get this,”

“Are you kidding? Of course not. Carla’s a sucker for babysitting Christopher,” Buck says.

Eddie huffs out a laugh. “You’re right about that one,”

When it’s finally time to head to bed, Buck starts feeling nervous and panicky again. Because Eddie's going to have to turn the lights off eventually, and Buck never sleeps in the darkness.

“You coming?” Eddie asks when he sees Buck standing in the doorway of Eddie’s bedroom.

Buck clears his throat. “Uh huh. Yeah. Sure,” he says, slowly walking into the room.

“You alright, Buck? You’ve been acting weird all day?” Eddie questions, frowning slightly at Buck.

“I’m fine, Eddie. Like I said. I’m just a little exhausted from work is all,” Buck tries to reassure him as he walks over to the bed.

Eddie nods. “Today was a pretty long day. Hopefully tomorrow’s a little better,” he says as he sits down on the bed. He reaches over and turns off the light, causing Buck to flinch at the sudden darkness. Eddie looks up and sees that Buck is still standing. “Babe?”

Buck lets out a deep breath. “A- Actually… can you- can you leave the light on?”

Eddie blinks a few times, and reaches over to turn the light back on. He looks back at Buck, and instantly stands up when he sees that Buck is breathing heavily. “Buck,” he hurries over to him, wrapping an arm around him protectively. “Hey, Buck. Breathe.”

Buck tries to. He really tries to. But he can’t.

“Buck, look at me, sweetheart,” Eddie says, gently turning Buck’s face so they’re looking at each other. “Breathe with me. Okay? Follow me.” Eddie breathes softly, allowing Buck to follow him. “You’ve got it.”

“I-” Buck begins when he finally starts calming down a little.

“Don’t you dare apologize,” Eddie warns softly, helping Buck down on the bed.

“I’m sorry,” Buck finishes anyway. He takes a deep breath. “I didn’t want you to find out-”

“Find out about what, Buck?” Eddie asks softly.

“I have this…” Buck sighs in defeat. He knows he’s going to have to tell Eddie the truth now, whether he likes it or not. “I have this fear of the dark. I- It stems from my childhood, because of my shitty parents-”

“Hey, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, okay Buck?” Eddie quickly reassures him. “Maybe… another time if you need to get it off your chest. But you don’t have to right now.”

Buck sighs in relief. “God I love you,”

Eddie chuckles, and leans forward to gently press a kiss to Buck’s forehead. “We can leave the light on, Buck. That’s perfectly fine with me. I don’t mind at all. You have your reasons. I’m not here to judge.”

Buck looks over at Eddie, frowning. “I’m an adult, Eddie. I shouldn’t have this stupid fear of the darkness,”

“Lots of adults have fears of the darkness. Adults have fears, and that’s okay,” Eddie says. “I have fears, and I know you would never judge me for them. I just want you to be okay, and feel safe.”

“I do feel safe,” Buck says. “You make me feel safe.”

Eddie smiles, gently squeezing Buck once. “How about we try to sleep, okay?”

Buck slowly nods, and he allows Eddie to get in the bed first, before crawling in next to him. Once he’s under the covers, he curls up next to Eddie, letting out a sigh of relief once Eddie’s arms are around him.

“Good?” Eddie asks, looking down at Buck.

“I am now,” Buck replies.


End file.
